I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
