im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
