Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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