OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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