She said her name was "party"
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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