shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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