Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
