I think im going to throw up on grandma
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize