covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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