I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
