i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
How external is "for external use only"?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
