So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
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i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
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Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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