Porn is love you can see.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
