Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
