belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
