Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
