its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
