erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
