u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
