I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
how drunk are you?
Several
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
