): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
