I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
