Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
