brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
