i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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