My cat gives me a boner
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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