his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
