There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
