Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize
