I wanna bring you to show and tell
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just cut my nipple shaving
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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