is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
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