you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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