and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
