you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
