So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize