Christians are straight up FREAKS
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize