Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
