Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
