.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
