im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
