i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
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My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
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My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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