real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
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He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
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For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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