I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
