So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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