just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
