Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
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