Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
