my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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