im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
