I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize