He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
